Like I'm Roger friggin' Ebert

Saw two films at the theater last week. Yes. at. the. theater. Twice. The theater showing the original English version actually had its act together and wasn't showing complete and utter crap, apparently bored by its usual fucking the Doctor up the ass cineastic policy.

My views on Death Proof: first half was way, way too long - I think it was more than obvious that the European cut was stretched since it wasn't being shown as a part of the Grindhouse double feature. Overall, it was okay - not brilliant, but didn't make me embarrassed to watch. Kurt Russell was good, I liked the car stunt, there was some dialogue that made me laugh, and can I just say that Vanessa Ferlito is fucking hot? Seriously. Could I have an ass like that? The Guitar Hero thought it sucked and he even has a big ole crush on Rosario Dawson, bein' as how her & me looks like twins & all, but he's generally been in a bad mood with newer Tarantino films, so don't mind him.

And my critique of The Simpsons Movie: laughed my ass off. Go see it. Nuff said.